"You must get these medicines, go down the road and you'll see the pharmacy, also get two syringes..Be quick, we don't have much time, she needs to be injected as soon as possible" Lil Karim nodded enthusiastically. He looked in the dirty pockets of his gray kurta, there was a folded handkerchief, he had tied rs 2000 carefully in a knot in that hanky. Just yesterday Maa had gotten her monthly pay. And here she was lying on a bed in the general ward of a gov't hospital. Is that what a person who works so hard as Maa get for a gift, when I was 5, and got admitted to school, Maa got me a big red ball, such a nice gift, and why did Maa get this?? Karim, though just merely 10 years old had thoughts deep and profound.
He ran off, his dusty kurta flying in the air, the rubber chappal he wore were on the verge of tearing apart, but did that matter to Karim??.. Karim ran amidst the people, since he was just 10, not much big either, people weren't letting him go ahead. And he wasn't even scared. Since he lived just with Maa, he was used to hustle here and there all alone. From one end of this town to the other he knew the roads as good as me.
Just beside the govt. hopsital stood erect a private hospital with lush green lawns. As Karim walked out of the main gate, he saw on on the pavement, a woman not much older than Maa, very nicely dressed sitting comfortably on a wheel chair, beside her stood a girl about the same height as him, she wore a tidy frock. And there from the hospital's main entrance came a big gentleman, he had a white elegant coat on. He must be their doctor, thought Karim.
"Mrs. Shaikh!, you will be perfectly fine, don't worry..hey guriya take care of Mom, ok" He gave this wide smile to the little girl. The girl was so cheerful, she was chattering nonstop.."Mom, you know I planted these jasmines, since you like them, as soon as we reach home I'll show you, and you know, Saba, well, she has gotten you a nice Saree..Oh Mom, I love you".. Karim stared... A Mercedes came along, everyone settled in. In a flash the car vanished.. Blank.. Road visible.. AR PHARMACY.. Suddenly Karim saw the pharmacy shop.. He rushed forward, crossed the road.. "Here, money, list, give me these medicines"... "as soon as possible" the words ring in his mind..echoes throught out..Karim doesnt know where he's heading to. he just ran, one floor..two floors..here is the ward...the bed at the corner...
"Doctor??" No sign..the bed..empty!! no, not empty, covered..White..Fully covered..Wasn't this Maa's bed? ,he thought.. He moved forward, seems like someone's lying there..but why did the doctors cover the face??? He finally removes the cover, heart throbbing, it was almost as if he wanted to deny it all, deny that it was Maa's bed.. As he lifted the cover, he could see it Maa sleeping, Maa smiling.. He jumped back in fright, no.. how???
Somewhere in the background he hears lots of voices.. "Her son was sposed to go and bring the meds, but I think what else could you expect from that brat?? must have joined his play mates in a game of ludo"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I didn't know how to end it..I was leaving it incomplete, do state if the end is written appropriately or not???
He ran off, his dusty kurta flying in the air, the rubber chappal he wore were on the verge of tearing apart, but did that matter to Karim??.. Karim ran amidst the people, since he was just 10, not much big either, people weren't letting him go ahead. And he wasn't even scared. Since he lived just with Maa, he was used to hustle here and there all alone. From one end of this town to the other he knew the roads as good as me.
Just beside the govt. hopsital stood erect a private hospital with lush green lawns. As Karim walked out of the main gate, he saw on on the pavement, a woman not much older than Maa, very nicely dressed sitting comfortably on a wheel chair, beside her stood a girl about the same height as him, she wore a tidy frock. And there from the hospital's main entrance came a big gentleman, he had a white elegant coat on. He must be their doctor, thought Karim.
"Mrs. Shaikh!, you will be perfectly fine, don't worry..hey guriya take care of Mom, ok" He gave this wide smile to the little girl. The girl was so cheerful, she was chattering nonstop.."Mom, you know I planted these jasmines, since you like them, as soon as we reach home I'll show you, and you know, Saba, well, she has gotten you a nice Saree..Oh Mom, I love you".. Karim stared... A Mercedes came along, everyone settled in. In a flash the car vanished.. Blank.. Road visible.. AR PHARMACY.. Suddenly Karim saw the pharmacy shop.. He rushed forward, crossed the road.. "Here, money, list, give me these medicines"... "as soon as possible" the words ring in his mind..echoes throught out..Karim doesnt know where he's heading to. he just ran, one floor..two floors..here is the ward...the bed at the corner...
"Doctor??" No sign..the bed..empty!! no, not empty, covered..White..Fully covered..Wasn't this Maa's bed? ,he thought.. He moved forward, seems like someone's lying there..but why did the doctors cover the face??? He finally removes the cover, heart throbbing, it was almost as if he wanted to deny it all, deny that it was Maa's bed.. As he lifted the cover, he could see it Maa sleeping, Maa smiling.. He jumped back in fright, no.. how???
Somewhere in the background he hears lots of voices.. "Her son was sposed to go and bring the meds, but I think what else could you expect from that brat?? must have joined his play mates in a game of ludo"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I didn't know how to end it..I was leaving it incomplete, do state if the end is written appropriately or not???
Comments
I didn't get this sentence. But otherwise nice. Ending abit sad though :(
The story should go like. The Pharmacy guys did not pay attention to him, and he kept waiting, a lady helped him get the medicines and when he came back to the hospital his mother was already dead. This lady later took care of this boy who grew up to be a successful man but he still miss his mother.
Also I agree with Ibrahim: "he knew the roads of the town as the back of his palm." Would be better.
Otherwise it is a very good story and very sad as well.
BTW this story is very similar to one chapter of the book called The Blood Seed by Andrew Ward.
Jamash ur right about the time aspect, but I like the juxtaposition of having the private and government hospital compared, as if saying it's only people with money that live.
you got the point, I was comparing the two hospitals, but still, I believe death can come anywhere..
Jamash, you know Civil and Jinnah hopsitals here.. ward other than emergency ones don't have extra syringes..
When last year I went to Jinnah hospital (I had never been there before) there was no board stating where Emergency is. Me and my brother had to walk all thru the hosp. until we found someone who could tell where emergency was..believe it, its true!!
If death has to come, it comes in private hospitals too..
I was wrong abt time though!! thanks for that..
And Ludo is a board game, Ibrahim.
-Karchiite(sorry sum prob with my comment box!)
Donno why I make all endings sad..
:(
:)